By Barbara Biziou
15 min read
How to use this Guide to Get Unstuck, Refocus your Energy & Start Living an Extraordinary Life Today
This Transformational Toolbox will teach you simple practical spiritual solutions that will allow you to become proactive rather than reactive in your daily life. As soon as you become reactive, you lose your power and cut off access to the part of the brain (pre-frontal cortex) that can help you make good decisions.
It is structured to do over 7 days, however, for optimum success, I recommend that you continue with step 5 until you have achieved your goals.
This guide will help you to break free of feeling stuck and refocus your energy so you can start moving towards the extraordinary life you deserve to be living.
Understanding new ways to create the life we want, as well as understanding WHY we do what we do, can be the deciding point between stepping forward into success or stepping back into the safety of your comfort zone. We are mainly where we are today because of the conscious and unconscious choices we have made. The amazing statistic is that 95% of our choices are unconscious. They run us whether we know they are there or not. Wouldn’t you rather have some say over this powerful force in your life? The good news is with simple choices you CAN, and they’ll soon lead to BIG changes if you take the necessary action steps.
Creating powerful rituals is one of the most effective and potent ways that can move you forward into an expanded future that holds new resources and unlimited success for you.
By changing your daily rituals, you create new stronger patterns in the brain that replace those that are no longer serving you. In my experience, it takes at least 40 days to create a strong goal-oriented habitual pattern to re-program the pathways in the brain.
Day 1: Take Inventory
It is important to know your starting point when making any changes. Take some quiet time to fill out the following questions below. Think of it as imputing your current address into a GPS. Don’t make things better or worse than they are. Learn to see things as they truly are and be fully honest with yourself. No one else needs to see this. I also want to recommend that you examine where you’ve been through the lens of acceptance rather than judgment. Have compassion for yourself even if you think you have made mistakes and bad choices in the past. The past is over and NOW is the most important moment of your life.
One of the best ways to become more balanced is to get to know yourself better. Set aside 20-30 minutes where you can focus on yourself. Grab a pen and take inventory where you are right now.
• How much exercise do you get a week?
• Are you happy with the state of your body?
• How is your energy level?
• Are you getting adequate sleep?
• Do your eating habits support your physical well-being?
• How are you at setting boundaries?
• Can you express your feelings easily and appropriately?
• Do you express yourself in a heart-centered way?
• Are you in touch with how you are really feeling in the moment?
For each relationship ask yourself:
• Do you honor and respect each other?
• Do you have space to be alone as well as together?
• Do you allow each other to change and grow?
• Are these relationships adding or taking away from your life?
• Are you really listening to understand? Or are you planning what you want to say next?
• What assumptions are you making about this person? How do you know it is accurate?
• Are you earning more than you are spending?
• Do you have money put aside for emergencies?
• Do you have a future “retirement plan”?
• Are you surviving or thriving?
• Do you have a healthy relationship with money?
• Are you doing work you love or just to pay the bills? (don’t judge)
• Are you using your natural talents to make a difference in the world?
• If you could do anything, what would it be?
• Are you happy to wake up and go to work?
• Do you take time to connect to God or a Higher Power daily?
• How are you spiritually fed?
• How consistent are you with a spiritual practice?
• How much time do you spend just having fun?
• How do you express your creativity?
• What floats your boat? What do you LOVE to do?
• How much are you laughing?
• Are you willing to change? What are you willing to change?
Day 2 & 3: Clear out and Let Go
Cultures around the world have been doing release rituals for hundreds of years for one main reason: they work! The brain does not know the difference between a ritual and an actual event so it reads it as true. Therefore it is essential that we clear out and let go of all that is no longer serving you first before we continue.
Day 2: Give away, recycle or throw out 50 items
It doesn’t matter how large or small, just release and let go. I usually recommend you start in your bathroom and kitchen first and then move to other areas of your home and life.
Day 3: Release Ritual
Begin by writing down all your limiting beliefs on paper:
an example is “I am not good enough,” “I’m too old to find the love of my life”, “It takes too much work to get my body in shape,”etc.” Don’t judge them just write down whatever comes up.
Light a Purple Candle: (to symbolize transformation)
Call in Spirit/Your Higher Self/God/Universe or whatever you feel most comfortable with. For you, it may be a spiritual figure, teacher, angel, guide or just a sense of light and connection. Just set a clear intention before you start and you will be guided.
Read over what you have written:
Take your time. Acknowledge that these beliefs have served you in the past, even if you aren’t sure how. Safely burn the paper: (in a fireplace, fireproof bowl, in the sink), rip it up or shred it as you say, “I now let go of all limiting thoughts, feelings and beliefs that I have ever created that are anything less than wholeness, love, and prosperity.” When you are finished, cleanse the space: by burning sage to clear the energy from the release. If you don’t have sage available you may also sprinkle fresh lemon in water around your space.
Take a bath or shower in Epsom salt or Sea salt:
This is the final part of the ritual that symbolically rinses away any negative energy remaining from the ritual or anything else that may remain that is not serving you. Envision all of it flowing down into the drain as you cleanse and purify your body and soul.
DAY 4: Open to Spiritual Wisdom
Now that you have made space for the new, it is time to connect to your Higher Wisdom. For some of you this will be easy, for others it will take time, so be gentle with yourself. If you keep a journal of the guidance you receive, over time you will begin to see the value in this exercise. It is like having access to a major University library – everything you need is available to you if you know how to plug into it. Try sitting in silence, practicing mindfulness, or listening to a meditation.
DAY 5: Visualization
Once you get clear on what you want, you need to visualize it as a present reality. For example, if you received guidance to begin writing or playing music, visualize yourself doing just that. If your guidance was to improve your health, visualize yourself as healthy, strong and flexible, eating food that supports you.
In order to create something new you have to first be able to imagine it. Thought creates a vibration that can be energized and qualified by our feelings. This is a powerful way to create a strong force-field of energy that will send out a clear pattern of what you want to manifest in your life. Therefore it is important to have your thoughts and feelings in alignment with your authentic expression and desires When you can visualize yourself doing something differently, even if it’s not happening in the real world, this has a strong effect on the body and brain, which reads it as “real.” By fixing your attention upon the end result you desire, you create a powerful energy that propels you forward.
You can then use affirmations to support your vision. Words affect your emotions, which in turn affect your actions. The trick to good affirmations is to make them believable. You cannot easily shift from, “I am afraid to speak in large groups” to “I love speaking in front of large groups,” however you can shift to, “I am getting more and more comfortable speaking in front of groups.” That sends a positive message to the brain and can motivate you towards achieving your goals. Always visualize in the present, not in the future. Imagine it as happening NOW. Take a few moments and write down one goal that you want to achieve. Write it down in the present. For example: I have a strong flexible body or I am a great cook.
• What is going on in your life when you imagine having your goal?
• Are there other people involved with you?
• Imagine looking around, what do you SEE?
• Can you HEAR any sounds?
• What do you SMELL?
• How do you FEEL having this goal realized?
Day 6: Get Support
The people who support you & cheer you on during the major transitions of life are crucial to your success. As Jim Rohn famously stated, “You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.”
1. Write a list of 5 people you can reach out to who support you. There may be different people for different things. For example, one may be simply a good listener, one may be great at helping you focus and one may just be a “play partner” to keep you light when you get too heavy.
2. Decide how you will contact them (email, phone, in person)
3. Start today: Contact one person from your list today
4. Follow up: Make sure you contact the remaining four in the next couple of weeks.
Day 7: Acknowledge Yourself
Congratulations on taking these important first steps to transformation! When acknowledging successes it is important to look at every small step you take towards your goal and take the time to celebrate it. By saying, “I did it!” you empower yourself and build a foundation for success.
RITUAL TO ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR PROGRESS
You will need about 10-20 minutes for this ritual. This is a crucial step in being able to move forward. You need to acknowledge any progress – no matter how small- that you have made. This teaches your brain that you are really committed to doing what it takes to be successful.
1. Write down all of the things you have accomplished and learned: Get a piece of plain unlined paper and write down all of the things you have accomplished and learned since you started this exercise. Write in bright colors: red, blue, orange, green, purple and yellow. Include all the insights and actions you have taken as well.
2. Read them out loud and say, “Congratulations!”: Literally pat yourself on the back and give yourself a big hug.
3. Give thanks: to all the people in your life who have helped you and give thanks to Spirit for guiding and assisting you.
4. Share your success: with at least 3 people that are close to you.
5. Do something to celebrate: Go out with some friends, go on a date, buy yourself flowers, take yourself to lunch, have a picnic in the park, or whatever celebration means to you, just do it!
As a transformational vision coach, spiritual teacher, and motivational speaker, Barbara inspires your growth and positive change. Blending ancient spiritual rituals with emotional intelligence and strategic communication skills, Barbara instructs, empowers and motivates her clients to achieve higher levels of meaningful success. Her two published books, ‘The Joy of Ritual’ and ‘The Joy of Family Rituals’ seamlessly integrate old world modalities, modern psychology and neuroscience, providing a roadmap for everyday life. A former television and fashion executive, Barbara left her corporate career to share the wisdom she amassed from decades of global studies with gurus, spiritual masters, and her own dedicated practice. Barbara lives in New York City, has a passion for film and theater, and works with private and corporate clients worldwide. Connect with her: https://www.barbarabiziou.com/
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